Bad Times

How much does it blow to be sad? I know, right! It’s horrible. As if being sad in the first place wasn’t bad enough, dealing with it is even worse. I’ve been going through some pretty bad times these past few days and have absolutely no idea how to handle myself. I’m a total mess. I cry incessantly, I have diarrhea and worst of all, I can’t shake the overbearing feeling of sadness. 

I’ve done all the obvious things one must do to quell gloominess. I tuned in to Puppy Cam, I ate licorice and I played with a baby. I even watched an episode of Hitched or Ditched, a show in which couples decide if they should get married or leave their significant other at the alter. Alas, even watching people get ditched at their own weddings could not entertain me. Wait, what am I saying? It was immensely entertaining, but it was a momentary feeling. 

So I turned to Andrew WK to make me happy again. I put on I Get Wet, got down to my undies and prepared to jump on my bed. This trick does not usually fail. Well, within like twenty seconds, I was singing along to It’s Time To Party with tears streaming down my face. WTF?

I give up. I am embracing my sadness. Maybe I could write beautiful poetry or lyrics or something equally meaningful often based on melancholy. Actually, that was a lie. That kind of stuff does not interest me at all. So what am I supposed to do? Life, sorry to say, but you are being a total jerk right now.

-Melissa

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7 Comments

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7 responses to “Bad Times

  1. spicy food will do that to you

    • badbangs

      lol, speaking of which, the episode of seinfeld where george eats the kung pow chicken and sweats like crazy played yesterday.

      who is this anyway? sign yourself, mystery commenter.

  2. “why are you sweating george?” “Its the Kung pow!!”

    mystery loves company

  3. m.c.

    hello. your post struck a chord for me, i think it was F minor, the saddest of all chords.. i also am in a state of profound sadness, i cry all the time, even while eating cheese, and i, too, have diarrhea. is there a correlation between limpness of spirit and liquidness of stool?
    or is it the cheese?

    anyway, my heart’s been shattered into ten billion pieces. i didn’t know it was so fragile, there was no sign, but you know what they say: you break, you pay. so that proverbial bull who was in your proverbial china shop, if you know what i mean, hopefully will have his karma account cleaned out. but i think i am projecting my own situation here…

    what makes me feel better is riding my bike. and its good exercise. so you will have strong arteries leading to the gaping hole where your heart once was.

    If all attempts fail, i have a hare krishna pamphlet that has been on my fridge for a few months… maybe it is time… their chanting is so, uplifting!

    this is what the first page of the pamphlet says:

    “S’il vous plait, chantez le mantra HARE KRISHNA HARE KRISHNA KRISHNA KRISHNA HARE HARE HARE RAMA HARE RAMA RAMA RAMA HARE HARE …et votre vie sera sublime !”

    i could use a new hair-do.. what do you say?

    • badbangs

      hey, i wanna thank you. your comment was helpful. bike riding is an amazing idea – yes, EXERCISE – why didn’t i think of that? i’ve been wanting to join a gym actually, and though the prospect of ‘working out’ and drinking protein shakes or whatever alongside super fit females has put me off, i want/need the endorphins.

      a haircut is a good idea, too. i vote yes. my lady charges me like 100 bucks though, so i think i’ll hold out a little longer, but i might give in soon.

      -mel

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