Monthly Archives: January 2010

Baby Talk

Lately, the topic of babies has been coming up left and right. The truth is that I’m fast-approaching what would hypothetically be my ideal baby-having age. I have friends who live together, others who are already married and others who are expecting their first child. Actually I lied about that last part – no one I particularly care for is having a baby; I just threw it in for emphasis. However, I do have friends who are considering getting pregnant. Always one to resist peer pressure, I decided a long time ago that I don’t really want children. Ever. This has always been a huge turn-off for the men in my life. It’s not like they want me to pop out a kid right away, but knowing that they won’t be able to spread their seed down the line hurts. My decision has been branded everything from “immature” to “stupid”.

Really? Am I a big monster for not wanting kids? Has all this rendered me less of a woman; or even worse, inhuman?┬áNot every woman wants children. I don’t think I should be judged or insulted for knowing what I want.

Sometimes, though, there are little moments that make me reconsider. My four year old cousin Lia came over today and kept gushing about her new BFF, a little boy named Justin. When I asked her what he looked like, she nonchalantly said, “He doesn’t have hair on his back.” WTF? Then my mom asked her if she would ever marry Justin (because I mentioned that Cory Matthews and Topanga knew each other when they were kids) and she said, “No, I think I’m gonna marry my mom.” So cute! Maybe I’ll have a kid strictly for comedic value.

Better yet, maybe I’ll have a baby for the sake of bringing someone into this world who isn’t an idiot. I think about that sometimes. We, as a society, definitely have too many assholes roaming around. Maybe I’ll have a whole slew of kids, Angelina style, to even out the ratio a little.

Or not. Like I said, I am for the most part not interested in having kids. If I reach a point where I feel I need to love something unconditionally, I’ll get a dog. Until then, let me live in my cold, baby-less world.

-Melissa

P.S. I’m not into marriage either.

P.S.P.S. On a somewhat related note, here I am as a kid (yeah, I eventually got braces) with my wonderful cousin Sara. Memories.

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Dee Is The Best

My friend / coworker Dee knits really well. Last year, she made me these very awesome mittens:

And look what she’s making me now:

A piano scarf! With a cat! AND it’s reversible. She’s the best, so I just wanted to say thank you.

Thanks, wonderful lady!

-Melissa

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Hi There

I’m posting because cute, completely unexpected fan mail inspired me to. Now, you may be wondering what I’ve been up to during my absence. To be perfectly honest, I’ve been having Golden Girls marathons, eating Costco-sized Toblerone bars and napping. Oh, and I was in Cuba for a while. I’ll post pictures of that when I find my camera’s USB wire thingie (never).

Here’s a recent development: I’m on anti-depressants. Don’t worry, I may be sarcastic, cynical and an overall hater of everything, but I’m not depressed. They were prescribed to me for my stomach problems. I thought I had Crohn’s disease or an ulcer or something like that, but my doctor seems convinced that my tummy lacks serotonin. The pills are working well but they have crappy side effects. I’m sleepy, I have a constant mini-headache and sometimes I start sweating in weird places! I don’t like that.

I’m supposed to take the pills for what I guess is a month-long trial period. I don’t think I’ll renew my prescription when the time comes. I just feel weird about having to take medication every day for the rest of my life. I also read that coming off Cipralex is a real bitch so I’d rather not get too into it.

So by the next time I see my doctor, I’ll be back to square one. I’ll just have to live with these excruciating, stabbing pains. Ugh. I actually dropped a class on my first day of school this semester because my stomach hurt really bad and was making loud, disgusting (albeit somewhat funny) fart noises.

Anyway, that was just a quick note to prove that I’m still alive.

I hope everything is good with you guys!

-Melissa

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